Dorian Gray

Handsome. self- effacing. egocentric. Affable. influential. powerful. charismatic and haunting mass appeal. narcissistic. hurt. brokenhearted. lonesome. weary and haggard. lost. gone in vain. Such descriptions portrays one of the most illustrious fictional literary characters of all time - Dorian Gray.

His is a life of simplicity and beauty yet yearns for something more - more that it doesn't satiate him or fulfill his wants. He wants to look better that only makes him pampered just to attract or to please someone. He fell in love but then again failed, brokenhearted, and hurt. His homosexual character let grow fonder, make him a better person and most of all, it is where he found his happiness - his true love!

But life has never been kind to him instead he suffered a bitter revenge - a price he must pay for being vain, arrogant and apathetic. At the point when he realized his mistake, learn to love more and was a kind, gentleman, tragedy befell him - he died.

He died without given a chance to redeem himself, to appeal his case, to justify his reasons and live in peace and bliss. His life is sweet turned bitter - unfortunate and tragic.

Read about his story and after you finish reading about him you may either love him, curse him, hate him or empathize of his ill-fated life. How I hope I will never be under the spell of the same misfortune as Dorian Gray but only retain beautiful moments and luck in his life!

The Missing Note To My Music

Who is the missing note to my song? The one word that would complete the lyrics. The music in my life will never be complete without that missing note - that missing link that will connect all the words and pieces in me into one single beautiful thought - one beautiful music that could transcend life into eternal bliss and prosperity. I already have that missing note and word in my mind but still not clear. Would it complete the song and transform it into a beautiful music or it would only weakens and soon break the chain - the link that bonds a strong and greatness of the music?

Until then we will know, only time can tell. Someday will know...

That Someone

I've been home and away from the life that I use to live. The life of noise and vibrancy, that were once mine were now gone. I've been gone to a cool countryside where peace and serenity rules over me. I've been gone to the place to think things over and plan better than just do what lies ahead to secure your place in an unsecured world. When I return to the place where I learn to love, I'm now ready to walk the tough road ahead of me. There is something in the place that its hard for me to leave and stay away for so long no matter how difficult the life there is. I've learned to love the place for the kindness it showed me, for the life it provided me and most of all the teachings of living in the cosy and illuminated city.
The one thing that makes me human is my emotion and that the city full of life made me realize that I'm a human with feelings capable of loving and being loved or can be happy or be hurt. Has someone touched my lovestoned heart or let's say make a difference or somehow became my life - the air that I breathe that I would die without. But fate and circumstances has taken it away from me - so cruel that it deprives me of the things necessary for me to be a human to live the life of real world. But somehow God never taken me for granted that it gives me a kind of life that showers me with blessings. Maybe it is just the step by step technique I need to undergo. I must face first the toughness of this complicated world before settling down with being myself a human with a kind, loving but sometimes foolish heart for the rest of my life.
Sometimes I think of a beautiful someone that once knocked on my door and I open it for the person to enter my life, but all of a sudden, it vanished out of my sight without me knowing what had happened or what caused its disappearance. Then I only think that the beautiful person is a ghost that I thought would be mine and became part of me. It is a soul that nourishes my mind and awaken my senses until it bleeds my fragile heart. A spirit that feeds me with a soup to satiate the life to be inspired and keep going. I keep telling myself to move on and never look back, but no matter how hard I try, the more I linger on the past that continue to lacerate my now bleeding heart. Everyday, I continue to lose lots of blood though I'm still alive and in good health. I feel that someone has been a part of me a long way past before that I couldn't live without. I had a frequent bouts of loneliness, sometimes feels like crying and sometimes without me knowing tears run down my face each time I lie down in the stillness of the night or the darkness of a room thinking of that someone. But hope comforts me and wipe my tears of helplessness and despair. Someone won't stop until I'm back in health and strong enough to walk and move. I need someone to pump blood to me to feel great again and to resuscitate air for me to breathe life. Until that day when all has been done, the work has finished, the sun is above my head, I will rest for awhile before settling down to be myself to have a world and a life of my own surrounded by a mutual affection shared with an awesome someone - my soul partner, my world, my life. Someone I feel but go unnoticed, someone that once knocked on my door but suddenly vanished or yet far for my eyes to see. Till then but for now brave the odds and beat the storm.
I believe I already found that someone or just lost it or so I think!

Echoes of the Hearts

Sometimes, we close our eyes and just listen to the echoes of our hearts. We all fall in love and there are times when we love so much that we lose ourselves in our own emotions. More often than not, we wonder why there is love that grows and love that grows cold. We would start to search for answer and try to find where love has gone wrong. However, in the end, we find ourselves where we started for we cannot question love when it has its own reasons. Love will always be as it always has been - silent, mysterious and deeply profound.

Many of us believe that love is forever, that never dies, only to be disillusioned in the end when we find our hands empty and our hearts longing. We mistakenly looked at love as need to be fulfilled. But love is only a gift given to us. We should not hold it in our hands for we may never find the strength to let it go when it decides to leave. We should only embrace its warmth and grow while it last and then freely open our hearts when its time to say GOODBYE.

When we fall in love with someone, we do not want the feeling to end for we believed it is everything. We are everything that we wanted to be. We pray that love will stay and grow in our hearts. But, if it doesn't then, we should never let our lives be taken by it for life should not end where heartaches begin.

There is always a reason why we have to make and decided to move on. When we have to say to goodbye to the feelings we wanted to stay forever but, let us not wave our hands with lonely hearts. For love will have set its wings free and find the place where it belongs. We may have lost it but then again, when we close our eyes and listen to the echoes of our hearts, we will hear that feelings resounding silently forever.

Then, we will know that it has never left us, for good that we had become because of love will always stay. It will always be there reminding us that we should be thankful and happy not because we have lost love, but because once in our lives, that feelings lived in our hearts and make us happy...

The Game of Life

The clock is ticking. The time is about to come. Its time to leave and start a new beginning. To start the game, roll the dice and break free from the chains of cruelty, sufferings and injustice and set foot on the ground of joy of independence and break the spell of disenchantment and evolve into the world of reality and comfort. Life itself is mysterious like the wind, we feel it but we can't see it. It is clever like the jack of all trades, it snatches life, ruin lives of others and take away moments in a split second. It is unfair in that it is bias on consequences regardless of how you react and doesn't consider any sentiments. It is the source of great contrasts, extreme highs and lows, your ultimate happiness or your great sorrow and pain, you may gain strengths or you may lose into your weaknesses and either you can take it or leave it and put you in a make or break situation.

Everything happens for a reason. You can't appreciate the beauty and purpose of life if you won't pass through the edges of it. At times you enjoy the comforts and at times the most awkward, perilous situations you can encounter the darkness to see the light, the wound to see the scar, the pain to find the comfort, the anxiety to obtain security, the weaknesses to gain strengths, the sorrow to embrace joy. In order to gain much, you must sacrifice much like your most priceless precious diamond jewelry you must pawn for a great necessity. But when we're almost there getting what we want, we lose it and later, we found someone bigger, greater and better much beautiful than before as replacement such is the explanation of life - the reason why things happen. In order to achieve ultimate, eternal happiness you must endure the greatest pain life has to offer.

Life has a start and end and in the end there's a new beginning. Like the leaves it prides itself in the field of vast sunlight. When autumn comes, it withers and fall to the ground and die, and in spring another set of leaves replaces it. Like in death, as most people agrees, there's a life beyond it, a new different kind of life - a life of hel or a life of heaven. As you are about to embark to a new beginning in your life, gather all the pain, sufferings, sorrows, anxiety and anguish you have and collect it and keep it and set sail and once you dock on a strange land, exchange your collections with fulfilled dreams and happiness.

You can play life like a snake and ladder, chess, monopoly, trivial pursuit. checkers, and game of the generals or play it like today's pc games - Sims, CounterStrike, Dota, Ragnarok, Command and Conquer.

That's the rule of the game called - - - L I F E ! ! !

Sunrise and Sunset In The Horizon

I'm wounded, bleeding, groping in pain and yet sorrow and grief accompany my injury. I'm like an innocent yearling about to be sheared, to be slaughtered. I'm like a soul floating in the chilly winds of uncharted horizons, like the dust troubling itself in the long winding road. Yet my spirit is being lifted by a pure heavenly soul. I feel like I'm traversing from the blood and tears of the fiery hell to the realms of uncertainty of purgatory to the gates of boundless mercy, affection and happiness of heaven. Paradise and ultimate joy is in sight but still far to come yet I keep on moving, I keep on walking until I reach it and finally come to my final destination where I can see my life, live and spend my life and until my life on earth is over. Life for me is a constant struggle, struggling towards an ultimate goal, despite the hardships and difficulties and most often than not, risk or danger is at stake wherever you go. But I'm familiar with it because I live with it and that will equip me as I journey life.

I see myself doing lots of things I wish to do, a nomad traveling places from all corners of the world and as my hair turns to grey, my skin wrinkled, my hands and legs are shaking, my sight is blur and a barely audible hearing, I see myself sitting on a warm sofa chair on the balcony of a house on the top of a cliff facing a vast ocean. I am looking on a spot as far as my eyes can see thinking the beautiful memories of the past and also the joys of the last moments of my life. And as I'm about to close my eyes, the last thing I see is the person I love the most and my lips is brimming with smile!

Vin Diesel, What Do You Think?

Freakin' out. Cryin. Those ain't cool stuff. Vin Diesel know these. To cry over spilt milk is damn. Butterflies in the stomach? Yeah, for sure. Colors? Yep, I agree.

Scared? On a thing called "LOVE".

Weakness/(es)? only one thing - love.
Biggest fear? Fear of rejection, fall out of love, heartbreak.

Favorite shout-out: (in mind) awoooh-awo-awo-awo (remember Scooby Doo?!)

Favorite line: Take action: Placeholder listings; External Proof: To be completed later. ;-)

Cool Thing You Can Do: I can be damn and bit** about the one I love and for the sake of it without the person making damn out of me (you f***in s***)

End Note Today: Drink and Be Merry Today for Tomorrow Is Yet To Come!

Comic Thoughts: "If cent coins persist, cosult your konduktor."

What's With The Name?

Many people in the chat rooms, in forums, in networking sites or other personal sites why I labeled my blogs and frequently used he name bootsguy in these sites. Some people thought I am selling boots, some offered their rainboots and others are annoyed when I constantly bugged them in chatroom with the usual catchphrase I use to look for someone to talk to and share interests and stories. They think it would be silly for me to think of boots, its smell when the feet is choked up in the boots and it perspires it contains germs that cause athlete's foot that stinks like a skunk or a rat, how it is being worn is too heavy and uncomfortable and most of all so unusual and weird for them to hear from someone so engrossed or deify a heavy and thick shoes people don't like to wear and only soldiers, workers, and adventurers would like to slip it on their feet. The main reason why I labeled this blog and myself bootsguy is a description of myself and who I am and what I feel. I know you are still confused and still intrigues of what I am talking. If these days, teenagers are devoted to their emo culture, I could compare myself to its counterpart in Europe - the skinhead. For you to know about skinhead, search wikipedia for skinhead and also to further support your knowledge about it, I would like to quote the site - Recon and Hotboots for the definition and explanation of boots fetishism.