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Tuesday, November 30, 2010

He Who Laughs Lasts

Some US Congressmen were given a history test. These were some of the most outrageous answers:

1. Where is Ancient Egypt?
Answer: Ancient Egypt is in the Sarah Dessert. It is inhabited by mummies who write in hydraulics.

2. Who are the Greeks?
Answer: The Greeks are a highly sculptured people. The Greeks gave us myths. A myth is a female moth.

3. Who is Socrates?
Answer: He was a famous Greek philosopher who died from an overdose of wedlock.

4. Who is Moses?
Answer: Moses climbed Mt. Cyanide to get the Ten Commandments. He died before arriving in the Promised Land, which is Canada.

5. Who is King Solomon?
Answer: Solomon had three hundred wives and seven hundred porcupines. Some guys are just luckier than others.

6. Who is Joan of Arc?
Answer: She was burned to a steak until she was well done.

7. Who is William Shakespeare?
Answer: He is the most famous writer of the Renaissance. He wrote tragedies, comedies, and hysterectomies.

8. Who is John Milton?
Answer: John Milton wrote Paradise Lost. Then he lost his wife, so he wrote Paradise Regained.

9. Who is Miguel Cervantes?
Answer: He wrote Donkey Hote.

10. Who is Sir Francis Drake?
Answer: He circumcised the world with a 100-foot clipper.

11. Who is Abraham Lincoln?
Answer: He is American’s greatest Precedent. He was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands.

12. Who is Benjamin Franklin?
Answer: He discovered electricity by rubbing two cats backwards as he declared “a horse divided against itself cannot stand.” He died of electrocution.

Take time to smile and laugh. Joy is a foretaste of heaven.
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