My Christmas is ruined by a simple badmouthing. I was about to leave to hear mass at the church for the last night when after I took bath I was reprimanded for taking bath at night when I easily got a runny nose and catch cold if I take a bath at night. My simple reason is that this is only one time because I need to before I attend mass but my reason is unaccepted and ignored instead he got so mad at me that he bewailed me with curse words. I was bedeviled last night that I lose my interest to hear mass. I went to sleep bitter hearted and so frustrated and so lonely. I missed Christmas back at home for two years since I am away at work in 2007 and 2008 and thought this is my last chance to enjoy back Christmas at home because maybe next year 2010 I'll be travelling and going to another place again but I never did. Maybe its just I need to be away and find the happiness that I want. Someone who could help me and afford trips for me and be my travel companion. I just want to be away from home because I was so bedeviled in this ugly place. I don't want to plant anger and hatred to anybody and I can forgive because even God forgives so do I but I just need to live and work in a far place and not here. I need to find a job outside the country and hopefully settle there for good the rest of my life.
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